New Beginnings

In this blog, I am documenting my life. I have come full circle, from trying to become a child of God to actually becoming one. It took me many years of self-deception and searching for something I could not describe to finally find Christ.

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I write research articles, have done so since 1994.  I married my best friend in 2012, and we are in it for the long haul.  I have four children and five grandchildren.  My expertise is in teaching Sunday School.  I love listening to them memorize verses, and telling them Bible stories.  You can see my current endeavors at, and on Facebook at Yucaipa Writer's Group.

Sunday, January 16, 2005

So I Said to God................

So I Said to God…..
(Part One)
[At this point, I still called him Jehovah]
“Thank you for allowing me to buy another car. I will use it to improve my life, and serve you.”

At the end of 1994, my son Scott wanted me to meet his fiancée, Nicky, so I asked Jehovah if I should take the bus. I checked Greyhound, and called Scott, telling him the price, which he and Nicky sent to me. I thanked God, but He was testing me, for when I went to Greyhound, they would not honor the price they had given to me over the phone. I could not argue, for out came a Security Guard with a big smile on his face. So I did the next best thing, which was to buy a one way ticket. I called Scott and told him what I had done, and he said that once I had gotten there, he would get me back.

I parked my car in Debbie’s driveway, and she took me to the bus terminal. I had a really bad headache that was traveling up and down my back. I told God that it would not stop me, and so I got on the bus and left.

(Part Two)
So I said to God © 2005
I got to Milwaukee, and Scott picked me up. It was then that I first saw and hugged Nicky, and I perceived she was nervous. It took 3 hours to get to the town where Scott lived, during which we had quite a discussion.

He told me that there was a Christmas Tree in his apartment. I asked God (silently) “Are you still testing me?” I kept listening to Scott, as he said, “At least I can thank the Man who made it possible for me to be here.” Nicky said that she was Catholic, but here sister had turned Pentecostal. She said that Pentecostal women could not wear slacks or cut their hair. It occurred to me that I was glad not to have that restriction placed on me. (But what about the restrictions I did have? Like I was not to do this or that, but it was “up to my conscience” if I did.)

My mind was going a mile a minute as we arrived at Scott’s apartment. I had not been this close to a Christmas Tree since 1971. My son had a male roommate, Bryan, who had put up Christmas cards in the doorway. Bryan was Nicky’s cousin.

That night, I thanked God for taking care of my son.

(Part Three)
So I Said to God ©2005

The next morning, I checked my answering machine in California, and there was a message from Phil. Phil is my brother, who was never exactly on the same page as I was. On the day in 1994, when my car had been towed away, he had fallen and broken his hip. Now this message was telling me that he had been hit by a car and I should call the hospital. I did and he had broken the other hip and leg. He was not there, having gone to therapy or something, so I got to talk to a nurse, who told me what a “nice guy” he was (he apparently knew how to act nice in front of some people) Later, he called and I was not there. When I finally got hold of him, he just complained about how bad he felt and then said, “Oh _____! I’ve got to call somebody.” And hung up. Phil never was a Jehovah’s Witness, but he had broken both hips in six months and I was thinking God was probably dealing with him as well as with me.

My purpose was before me here in Wisconsin, and he would have to handle his own problem. God wanted me to deal with my relationship with my son.

(Part Four)
So I Said to God… ©2005

I met Nicky’s mom, Pat, that day. She impressed me as being very aggressive. I was to find out that I was right. Her aggressiveness kept everybody hopping, including my son. She had brought me a pound of coffee, so I could make some for myself. It was at her home that I was to spend part of Christmas Eve, and I was stressed about that. But I talked to God, promising not to discuss the Bible with anyone, because, of course, I was just helping Scott. Then she said that I was “welcome to go to church” with them on Christmas Eve. I had to think of something fast.

I asked God, who was still testing me, what I should do, and suddenly it came to me. I called Pat and asked her if they had choir music (after all, hadn’t I been in the choir when I was Lutheran?) She said yes, they could get there early to hear the music. So I would not be celebrating Christmas; I would be listening to choir music.

(Part Five)
So I Said to God…… ©2005

Christmas Eve was interesting; we started by going to Nicky’s sister’s Pentecostal Church, where they were singing Christmas hymns, and there was a man standing in front with an overhead projector which showed the words to the songs. The entire program featured a children’s singing group, a duet by two girls, and Nicky’s sister was supposed to sing, but for some reason did not.

From there, we went to Nicky’s Catholic Church, and heard the choir. I was beginning to think Christmas was not so bad, but then the Priest said something about Santa Claus, and I asked Jehovah’s forgiveness for that thought.

Most of Nicky’s family was there, and I remember thinking that some of her uncles were kind of cute. Scott leaned over and said that most of the people there were a little inebriated, and I was thinking that it’s so cold in Wisconsin, what else could they do?

Then we went to Nicky’s parents’ house for the “opening of gifts”; they had given me one too, and there were many tears and thank you’s. I gave Nicky’s dad a hug. But I did not say, “Merry Christmas” to anyone.

(Part Six)
So I Said to God……. ©2005

I thought a lot about Ralphie. One day, I tried to call him, but he was probably out fishing. Ralphie lived in a trailer down the road from mine in California, and he didn’t like to turn his heat on, which made me worry that he might get sick. But the alcohol he drank apparently kept him thawed out. Anyway, when I finally did get in touch with him, he had been out fishing. He didn’t get along with any of our neighbors except me, and he had a daughter in town with whom he spent some time, but much of his time was spend either fishing or thinking about the past with his wife, who had died in 1960. Ralphie did one thing which concerned me; he read the tabloids, specifically the astrological fortune-telling stuff, and he believed everything they said. He used to tell me about being able to speak to his wife on the phone, and I would ask him where he learned that stuff, and he would point to his pile of magazines.

So when I finally spoke with him on the phone from my son’s house, he was feeling okay. I promised God I wouldn’t worry anymore.

(Part Seven)
So I Said to God…. ©2005

The day after Christmas, Nicky came over to Scott’s house very upset and crying. Her mom, Pat, had flown off the handle. The whole family was name-calling, backstabbing each other, and I found out later that Pat had almost kicked her husband out of the house. (He didn’t leave, of course) Scott went over to Nicky’s house, and I wasn’t sure what went on, because I would call and someone would hang up on me. Some time later, Nicky came back to Scott’s and told me to get ready to go. I told her that that the demons were out today, and that was what caused her mom to go off like that.

We went to Nicky’s relatives for a progressive meal, which I had not experienced since my days in the Lutheran Church, so it was interesting to experience. My headache was not gone, and I was really wanting to get rid of it, so I drank some white wine, which helped a little. Pat was okay by then, and everything went well. The last house was Uncle Bill’s, and it was set up in the basement. We all just sat and talked and nibbled on veggies. “Uncle Bill” sold real estate. He and his ex-wife were hosting this “End of the Road” party, and some said they were getting back together, and others did not want them to.

This was Pat’s family. I sensed much dysfunction, but I asked God not to let it touch my son.

(Part Eight)
So I Said to God…. ©2005

It was the next day, Thursday, and Scott got paid from work, and bought me a bus ticket to get home. I left Friday on the bus and three days later, I arrived at the terminal where Debbie was to pick me up and take me to my car. Her husband, a Jehovah’s witness elder, was with her, and asked me if I had told my kids that they would be bird food. I did not answer him. Nor did I feel any guilt, because nothing I had done in Wisconsin was wrongdoing.


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