New Beginnings

In this blog, I am documenting my life. I have come full circle, from trying to become a child of God to actually becoming one. It took me many years of self-deception and searching for something I could not describe to finally find Christ.

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I write research articles, have done so since 1994.  I married my best friend in 2012, and we are in it for the long haul.  I have four children and five grandchildren.  My expertise is in teaching Sunday School.  I love listening to them memorize verses, and telling them Bible stories.  You can see my current endeavors at nicenet.org, and on Facebook at Yucaipa Writer's Group.

Tuesday, October 18, 2005

It was in 1971 when I started wavering between the love of Christ and the worship of Jehovah

In 1971, I left the Lutheran Church after an incident which I haven't been able to talk about for 34 years.

On October 13 of that year, I had been in another city, having left a friend babysitting my kids. I came home, and the house was empty. Even the dog and the cat were not there, and that was strange. There was a note on the kitchen table telling me that my children were in some home and that I should call this number. I did that, and was put on hold, hung up on, and made to feel very upset. I called back and finally got somebody on the line, and was told that my children were alone and the police had taken them out and put them in a home and there would be an invistigation. I told them that I had left a babysitter with them, but they would not believe me. I did not know where she was, and I did not have time to find this out, for a half an hour later, a police officer came to the door and present me with a warrant for my arrest. I was shaking so bad, and I sat down. They took me down to the police station, and I went before the judge. He told me the charges were contributing to the delinquency of my minor children, and asked me how I would plead. I did not know what to say, so I said I was guilty. I figured I must have been, since I was not there for them, and they had been walking the streets looking for someone to babysit with them. I could not find my friend. She had moved out leaving no number or anything. So the judge sent me for thirty days in county jail, and an hour and a half after arriving home from out of town, I was in jail. It had gone that fast. I got seven days time for good behavior, and so I was only there for 23 days, but I spent my 29th birthday in jail, and there was no one to bail me out or even find my glasses so that I could see while I was there. The bottom had fallen out of my life.

The Sunday after I got out of jail, I went to the Lutheran Church, and took Holy Communion. Some people whom I had thought were my friends were turning around and staring at me, but they did not talk to me. When I went up to the altar to take Communion, the pastor gave me a dirty look. That was the last service I attended. I still loved God, but not the Lutheran Church.

I had a friend who was associated with Jehovah's Witnesses, and she was telling me some things, but I did not like her much; another friend whose lifestyle was not the best was also associated with them, but I could not look at the actions of others, for they were merely humans. I had to look for God. And my mind was so screwed up, that the magazines looked good; the Watchtower and Awake and the Truth book were looking more and more sensible as time wore on.

This was the beginning of 25 years of torment, for I had to believe things that I had never heard before. Actually, I never did accept a lot of it, for a lot of is was inhumane to others.

Today I am glad that I retained that humanity.